.to know Him.

there’s a lot of big things i’ve learned here the past few months.

but this one might be one of the biggest.

and it’s been thoughts and feelings so near and dear to my heart,

i’m not quite sure how to articulate it.

but i felt impressed to share it,

so i’ll try.

here goes something.

have you ever had something you've heard your entire life,

but it took awhile until it actually clicked and you finally understood it?

today was one of those days.

the Atonement is so multi-faceted, 

it's something i'll always be trying to understand for probably the rest of my life...

but today i realized that Christ wouldn't be who He is without us, 

and we wouldn't be who we are without Him.

we're made up of moments and experiences. 

to be without one of those moments, or one of those experiences,

would mean for us to be a different person.

but we are who we are because of the moments and experiences we have. 

and Jesus Christ knows exactly who each of us is,

and who we each have the potential to become,

all because of His atoning sacrifice -

to personally suffer, empathize, and aid us

through each of our moments and experiences that make up who we are.

that being said, Christ has come to know each of us...

but how do we come to know Christ?

being here in the holy land has definitely offered a lot of perspective

and factual knowledge in that regard.

i've read the scriptures, multiple talks, books, and articles on the Savior and His life.

i've learned about His character and how he responded in various situations, 

how His ultimate goal was to bring glory to the Father...

i've seen bethlehem where He was born, 

walked on the steps he took to the temple, 

seen multiple places where he may or may not have ascended into Heaven... 

all fun facts, right?

but i've learned that even though all these things were helpful in gaining a more rooted, 

clear knowledge and testimony of the Savior,

it wasn’t so much the content of the experiences

but rather why we have the experiences we do.

i believe we're given the individual experiences, opportunities, 

situations, trials, and circumstances for many reasons,

but ultimately because it helps us come to know Jesus Christ.

because, in essence,

they are the very things that make up who He is as well.

because the experiences and moments in my life and your life,

make up experiences and moments in Christ's life.

there's all these overarching principles in the universe of love, fear, addiction, death, joy... 

and two people can learn one of these principles very different ways.

but Christ understands each of those perspectives perfectly 

because He's got every experience and every moment of everyone on His shoulders, 

to help aid, comfort, and guide us what we individually go through.

His understanding would be incomplete without you or i.

for instance, maybe from one of our individual life experiences,

we taught the Savior something about love as He suffered in the Garden of Gethsemane.

not only did that contribute to His understanding of the principle,

but also it would be very different, less personal, and less meaningful

to have a Savior try and empathize through someone's else's perspective on love,

regardless of how similar the experience might have been.

the Atonement is meaningful because Jesus Christ 

exactly knows and perfectly understands

you and i.

and every person we meet and come to understand

as we exercise the pure love of Christ,

is another piece to the puzzle.

as we take our own experiences and come to know others,

we come to know Christ

because His understanding is in each of us.

thinking about this made me realize 

the worth that each of us has as well - 

that Christ needs us just as much as we need Him.

i don't think Christ would have gone through what He had 

if He didn't perfectly understand that worth.

and by knowing how much He loves us,

should reflect in how much we should also value each other.

long thoughts short:

we're all made up of moments and experiences.

we share those moments and experiences with Christ.

He perfectly knows us individually,

and we come to know Him.

as we strive to develop charity,

we take hold of His perfect understanding,

and come to know and love others

which furthers our knowledge of the Savior.

He needs us, and we need Him.

He died for us because He understood our worth,

and everything in our lives revolves around coming to understand
His worth in ours.

.raw.

i remember before coming to israel,

wondering what this experience would be like.

the city,

the byu center,

what the group would be like,

if i would make any friends,

if i needed to go to the bathroom and no one spoke english to direct me to the WC…

all very valid wonderings.

before leaving for the summer,

i went to bid farewell to chloe.

beautiful, hilarious, bestest childhood friend

and well-experienced world traveler, chloe.

i expressed my wonderings to this dear chum,

and i’ll never forget what she said.

“liza, you’re going to be in such a unique experience with these people. you’ll eat together, study together, play together. there’s nothing more bonding than when you’re hiking around so hot and sweaty… you don’t have to feel insecure because everyone is going through the same experiences together. 

traveling makes you r a w – you’re thrown in a completely foreign place, and it shows you what your insecurities and strengths are and how that makes who you are and what you want to become. don’t worry too much… by the very nature of the experience, you can’t be anything but yourself.”

a few weeks ago we went hiking at a place called, ein gedi.

twas a beautiful hike,

but man, was it hot as hades.

we’d get drenched from head to toe

in every pool and waterfall we passed.

and walking around wet and gritty,

with stretched out clothes,

scraggly hair,

smudged makeup,

laughing, sweating, and splashing around

with the best of friends…

those words came back to me 

like a familiar whisper.

this is it.

totally, completely, and utterly

R A W.

.to be or not to be.

July, 19, 1944

“We have good times in the ghetto – we can get some cabbage with what to lessen our mortal hunger – the only care is about our future; the nearest future; because everyone I convinced that the war is decidedly approaching its end; fears are aroused by rumours according to which the G. destroyed tens of thousands of Hungarian Jews – when still this question of 'to be or not to be' be taken off our shoulders?”

(anonymous entry copied from a journal at yad vashem, a jewish holocaust museum)

… 

 can you even imagine?

.turkey.

a picture’s worth a thousand words,

so i’ll let these visual aids do most of the talking

a) to spare you a mile long explanation

of quite possibly one of the greatest weeks of my life

and b) my lack of ability to even try and articulate

how absolutely incredible TURKEY is.

hagia sophia.

the oh so wonderful, talented, brilliant, and beautiful christina – aka my {turkish} roommate.

istanbul archaology museum – ishtar gate. i’m glad unicorns were part of antiquity.

“oh, that’s so cool it says ‘FAITH’ all around istanbul… lemme take a million pictures of it.”… NOT. good thing i have lysdexia.

blue mosque (probably my favorite mosque we visited. #thatizniktiletho.)

basilica cistern.

grand bazaar. it was… grand. truly.

boat ride on the bosphorus (the strait that connects europe and asia).

anzac beach.

i loved walking through the cemetery and reading the gravestones here.

troy.

view from our hotel. yes, that is the aegean sea. and yes, we joyfully swam in it.

overlook of asos. and yes, i realize i look like i came straight out of ‘full house.’

say hello to my favorite snack - the çokopren aka the turkish e.l.fudge cookie.

i was obsessed with the fields upon fields upon fields of red poppies.

my life is in ruins.

sardis

behold, the underground remains of constantines palace – location of the creation of the nicean creed. and while we were sitting here a real, live, mini earthquake happened. twas trippy.

turkey = it doesn’t get much better than a massage on the side of the road.